People might not know how hard it was for me to live solely on MealPlan when I was in my 1st year of degree, trying my hardest to stay away from making loan. Yet everytime I saw my friends getting paid *relatively* handsomely at that time of the semester, I could not help from feeling jealous.
It was a tough year struggling my freshman year without any sort of financial assistance, and having to see that everybody who has taken PTPTN loan make it past the year with their brand new laptop and some of them even have new mobile phones did not make it any better. The only thing keeping me alive throughout the year is the RM448 per sem sum I had in my Meal Plan card.
I think the first year was the year when I had to perform so that I could apply scholarship for my second year and onward. I remember having to wait for bus for 30 minutes, through rain and shine, to go to the library just to use the computer to finish my assignments.
Alhamdulillah, after so many rejected applications, the third sem, I was offered two scholarships; JPA and PNB (I have to refuse one though, so I accepted JPA's offer). Some of my friends did apply for the scholarships; but even with good results, they didn't make it. So I do understand how that made them feel. they didn't have a chance to make the difference.
But those who didn't work hard enough, playing around with their laptops and whatnots, which they bought on their loan, are the ones who, in my opinion, should not feel so bad about repaying the debts.
True, not most people can achieve first class honour, but having it as an excuse to condemn people who had given you your borrowed convenience is not a pretty sight or a clever thing to do.
If you are so reluctant paying the loan, why not show it by getting good results?
There are two alternatives for PTPTN, which are:
1- Get good results for 1st year, then apply for scholarships the second year. Most of my friends who got 3.50 above were offered JPA scholarship the 2nd year. And ALL of my coursemates who got at least 3.60 (and applied for JPA) were offered the scholarship. 2 of them were offered PNB.
2- Get first class honour so that you can change your loan into a scholarship.
Yeah, instead of screaming, cursing on twitter, why not get yourself a first class honour first? I mean, it is indeed a good alternative to screaming profanities and having to go through all those predicaments of borrowing PTPTN.
People kept telling me that I could do it because I was smarter than them, but I don’t think that they knew how much struggle I put just to validate myself. My first year in university, I didn’t sleep during exam nights, too afraid to lose the chance to perform.
I studied every single day, bringing books with me everywhere I go. I admitted, I look like a stuck up bookworm, but I did that only so that I could have a scholarship, thus getting my ass out of the living hell.
I didn’t have money to buy new clothes, and I wore the same pairs of shoes and slippers from the first day of studying to the last day of my 1st year. I cut my hair only two times a semester, because the money that I pay for getting one is enough to feed me for a day.
Some of you might say that I’m lucky, but there’s not just luck in play when you are applying for scholarship. Work hard is a better keyword. You just call others lucky because you don’t want to make yourself feel bad for not trying and being lazy.
People who tried but didn’t make it – they are the ones who have the right to feel frustrated. But when you didn’t try that hard, you didn’t push yourself; then you should feel ashamed of even trying to make an organisation who tried to help you in the first place to look bad.
I’m not playing with the rezeki card here, but how many of you perform solat hajat, pray invariably everyday for scholarship? If you don’t do that, well what can I say. That is also a form of effort.
Heck, I didn’t even ask you to do it every single day of your academic years. Just for a year; just a year – sacrifice things that you think are your convenience. Sleep less, play less, shopping less. Give more time and efforts on studying. Just for a year.
Or in academic terms, just 32 weeks of a year. Once you've got a scholarship on your second year, you finally can do so many things that you've been craving for that darn first year; you’ll have money for shopping better clothes, you’ll have money to purchase better laptop; and you’ll have money to pay for a driving license.
Once you have a scholarship, you’re living a decent life in university.
And most importantly, after you finally have a scholarship in your second year, you can pay back the loan you have made in your first year if the scholarship backdates, which is a great way to say “F**k you PTPTN! I ain’t gonna be your slave!” Isn’t it great?
Consider this; you never work hard to get a first class, you sometimes skip classes even. But when it comes to paying the debts that you borrowed, you become mad?
That is quite an overreaction on your part. Nobody says that PTPTN is a fair and just system, but not making an effort to get out of the bloody system is just your problem in the first place.